There is a mad woman living in the Imbeza Valley, pa-Gowera. Which means 'at Gowera's place'. In Zim we say 'mad', while the rest of the world says 'mentally ill'. But it is the same thing really.
Treatment for mentally ill folk in Zim is generally non-existent, unless they start posing a clear and constant danger, and then they are whipped away and locked up. Thus it is that Theresa has been able to wander around the valley with impunity - and yesterday she visited La Rochelle.
Somewhat cooked in the head, Theresa is generally harmless, but every once in a while her family get sick and tired of her, and send her out and about. This must have happened in the last week, and so she made her way to La Rochelle, where started staying in the small cottage by the entrance gate to the hotel - until the National Trust gardeners noticed that someone was sleeping in their store, and locked it.
Deprived of a roof to call her own, Theresa walked around the outside of the hotel until she came to an open door - which just happened to be the door of Stateroom - the large room just after the bar. We leave the outside door open in the daytime to air the room.....
Wandering into the room, she obviously tried the bed, just as Goldilocks once did, and found it wanting. We know she tested the bed because she left a dirty mark on the bed covers. But not good enough....
and so she went out of the door of Stateroom, across the passage, to where the door of Room 3 stood invitingly open.....
Testing the bed, she must have found it "Ju-uust RIIIIIGHT!" - whereupon she settled down and fell fast asleep. This is what we later found.....
She then woke up feeling a little peckish, and drifted through to the Reception, where she met David the waiter. She asked him for some food (as you do in hotels) but unfortunately for her, David recognised her as 'the penga woman from down the road', and kicked her out. It was only later that we discovered the bed and towel as pictured above!
So - if you ever want to stay for free at La Rochelle - just help yourself!
Have a great day.
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